We've all heard of chow hounds, but chow yorkies? Yuk! Too hairy! (Photo illustration: Darrell Eager, Wall Street Journal)

The book, “Eating Animals,” hits the shelves today. It has already received tremendous accolades from critics of all stripes and spots. Natalie Portman writes in the Huffington Post that she read the book — a preview copy, we assume, which we did not have the privilege of receiving at Dog Daily News — and turned from a 20-year vegetarian to a vegan. Now how’s that for an endorsement?

The book is about what it really means to eat animals these days. Factory farms are clearly in its sites. But it’s not just your standard “this is so sad, and look at what it’s doing to the environment” tome. The book, by novelist Jonathan Safran Foer, is described in a Huffington Post review as “a triple marvel: the research is serious and far reaching, the writing clear, clever, accessible and in a few instances graphically ingenious, and the cause is genuinely important.”

We look forward to getting our paws on a copy. Too bad Jonny boy didn’t send us a comp copy like he sent to Natalie. Maybe we’re not cute enough. Or maybe it’s because we’re dogs? Could he have a thing against dogs? He sure loves them chickens and cows, but what about us dogs?

This baby obviously read Jonathan Safran Foer's writings

We investigated. And what we found out made our stomachs turn: This alleged vegetarian has just written an article for the Wall Street Journal entitled, “Let them eat dog: A modest proposal for tossing Fido in the oven.” It could be an excerpt from the book, but as you may recall, he didn’t send us a copy, so we wouldn’t know. Here are some excerpts. (Do not read beyond this if you are a dog. Especially if you are eating breakfast.)

• Despite the fact that it’s perfectly legal in 44 states, eating “man’s best friend” is as taboo as a man eating his best friend.

• Dog meat has been described as “gamey” “complex,” “buttery” and “floral.” And there is a proud pedigree of eating it…Hippocrates praised dog meat as a source of strength. Dakota Indians enjoyed dog liver, and not so long ago Hawaiians ate dog brains and blood. Captain Cook ate dog…And dogs are still eaten to overcome bad luck in the Philippines; as medicine in China and Korea; to enhance libido in Nigeria and in numerous places, on every continent, because they taste good.

• Of course, something having been done just about everywhere is no kind of justification for doing it now. But unlike all farmed meat, which requires the creation and maintenance of animals, dogs are practically begging to be eaten. Three to four million dogs and cats are euthanized annually. The simple disposal of these euthanized dogs is an enormous ecological and economic problem. But eating those strays, those runaways, those not-quite-cute-enough-to-take and not-quite-well-behaved-enough-to-keep dogs would be killing a flock of birds with one stone and eating it, too.

This "modest proposal" gives new meaning to the words, "dog food."

• Few people sufficiently appreciate the colossal task of feeding a world of billions of omnivores who demand meat with their potatoes. The inefficient use of dogs—conveniently already in areas of high human population (take note, local-food advocates)—should make any good ecologist blush. One could argue that various “humane” groups are the worst hypocrites, spending enormous amounts of money and energy in a futile attempt to reduce the number of unwanted dogs while at the very same time propagating the irresponsible no-dog-for-dinner taboo. If we let dogs be dogs, and breed without interference, we would create a sustainable, local meat supply with low energy inputs that would put even the most efficient grass-based farming to shame. For the ecologically-minded it’s time to admit that dog is realistic food for realistic environmentalists.

Jonny even gives a real Filipino recipe for Stewed Dog, Wedding Style.

We assume that the author (who didn’t send us a book, in case you were wondering) is writing most of this tongue-in-cheek (and not dog cheek, we pray). At least we hope so. But you never can tell with a cow and chicken hugger. And it’s true that a lot of people around the world like to eat dogs.

Click on book fan Natalie Portman and she'll show you where to vote

My canine cousins are often crammed en masse into tiny cages and live utterly abysmal lives. We Dog Daily News staffers can’t believe this still happens. It does. And if people take Jonny’s “modest proposal” seriously, dogs in these 44 states he mentions (do tell, Jonny, is California among them?) might want to think twice before taking the offer of someone who says they want to have them over for dinner…

So we ask you to cast your vote. The Wall Street Journal is conducting a poll asking people to say yes or no the question, “Would you eat dog?” So far the No votes are outnumbering the Yes votes, but only by a ratio of about 2 to 1. Come on people, we can do better than this! Do that many of you really think it’s OK to eat dogs? We’re not talking hot dogs here, we’re talking Chihuahuas and poodles and German shepherds. And even Jack Russells!

Stop the madness! Cast your vote! My life may depend on it!

Just because we're infinitely more popular than cats doesn't mean we can't get along.

We knew it all along, but it took a major nationwide vote to prove it: Dogs are ridiculously popular compared to cats!

Organizers of Meet the Breeds, a NY extravaganza touted as the world’s largest showcase of dogs and cats, held a contest for two months before this week’s event. Some 9,000 pet lovers cast their votes, and the winner was announced today. Despite cat households outnumbering dog households by 13 million, dogs were the paws-down winners, with 65 percent of the vote.

We at Dog Daily News would like to think we had something to do with the preponderance of votes in the canine direction. We did our best to swing the vote with this article we wrote. But even without our time at the keyboard, dogs would clearly be the winners. We’re just so much more likable. There are exceptions, of course, and I myself have to report that I have a couple of friends of the feline persuasion. But if you have any doubts as to why dogs fetch far more votes than cats, check out this list of 15 reasons dogs are better than cats. Even if you are a cat, we think after reading this you will have to agree with us.

Nope, no cats here! Nope, don't see any at all! Hmm, where could they be? Not in Ireland! (Photo: Getty Images)

We’re still making stump speeches, of sorts, to get out the vote for dogs. (See previous entry, Vote for Dogs, Not for Cats!, for more on the debate and how you can cast your vote for the right animal.) While eating my loathesome kibble this morning, I read something in USA Today that I thought would help make our case for dogs even more solid. It made my “dog food” taste almost edible, so I knew it I had to share it (the story, not the kibble, alas).

It turns out the Irish have one of the highest ratios of dogs to cats in the world. (It may be the highest, but I’m not sure anyone has polled residents of places like Chad or Kazakhstan, so I can’t definitively say.) In Ireland, dogs rule bigtime: Some 36 percent of Irish households keep dogs, while a mere 10 percent house cats. That’s just embarrassing for cats. We staffers at Dog Daily News are not laughing with you, cats, we are laughing at you! Ever so gently and politely, of course.

Since Ireland has produced some of the best minds, finest poets, and most talented writers in the world, it’s a place we trust for its taste and sensibilities. Ergo you should follow Ireland’s lead and vote for dogs. (I’m so glad I took that rhetoric class last year. What an iron-clad argument on behalf of my species.)