Petrol! It's purported to be like giving your dog a can of gas. We're not sure most dog people want this, especially Jack Russell and yellow Lab people. Go dog, go!

OK, we know dogs are hot. Humans are forever creating new inventions to make us happy. We have swanky beds and gourmet foods and organic doodads and even our own videos to entertain us. But until now, we have been lacking one thing that’s utterly ubiquitous in the world of humans: The aluminum beverage can — the great equalizer. Humans (at least American humans) great and meek guzzle about 57 gallons of soft drinks every year, according to EMedExpert. Dogs? We get water.

Enter Petrol. It advertises itself as the “First ‘Dog Drink’ in an Aluminum Can.” We kind of associate aluminum cans with the Budweiser flotsam Uncle Bubba chucks out the pickup truck window, and also with Alzheimer’s disease. But apparently, aluminum is hip. From the Petrol press release: “Discerning dog lovers looking for a healthy treat for their pooches may be surprised they can now find one in the most popular and environmentally-friendly beverage package in the world – an aluminum can.” Who knew?

Petrol gives your dog BIG nutrition, apparently!

The can is admittedly very cute, as you can see in the photo to the left. (Since it’s 12 ounces, we don’t think the scale is quite right…) But what’s inside? The Petrol website states that “Petrol is a delicious dog treat beverage with vitamins and 100% natural flavorings for optimum canine health and wellness. This savory, vet-formulated drink is not only refreshing and nutritious – dogs prefer it 4-to-1 over regular water.”

While perusing the list of ingredients, and lack thereof, we were disappointed to see “no meat or meat by-products.” Is this something the Petrol people should be bragging about? I mean, if I’m going to drink something other than water, I’d like it to have some meat in it! But then again, I’m just a dog.

One ingredient we were relieved not to find listed was gasoline. After all, petrol is simply the British word for gasoline. The product is advertised as fuel for your dog. We put 2 and 2 together and got a little concerned. But nowhere is there a single mention of any petroleum product. In fact, the main liquid is water — and not just any water, but “100% reverse osmosis water for purity and wholesomeness.” Cool! We Dog Daily News staffers often enjoy drinking from toilet bowls and old puddles (truly nectar of the dogs). We’re not sure we need reverse osmosis water. But our humans will like the idea. And since they’re the ones forking over the cash for these cans, that’s what counts.

Cheers!

Barney, before and after. Even his spots have shrunk. But did he really need to be wrenched from his person to get a svelte profile?

It was with sadness that we learned of yet another British dog being torn out of the loving arms of a person who had inadvertently made him obese.

According to a BBC report, John Green testified that “he treated Barney as more of a friend than a dog and that he did not set out to deliberately harm the dog.”

As a friend, John shared his chips and chocolate and other treats with Barney. Barney ballooned up to 154 pounds — twice the recommended size for a Dalmatian. We don’t think this is a good thing at all, but we wouldn’t do what the courts did: Not only did they take Barney away from John and put him in the care of a kennel that put him on a strict diet and exercise program; they also banned John from having any dogs for the next 10 years. That seems over the top.

Barney is not the only British dog taken away from his person because of obesity. We recently reported on Fat Bob, a Scottish dog who was far too paunchy for his own good. His person doted on him too much, giving him fish & chips, and lots of tins of dog food. He, too, was taken away from his person, sent to a Fido Fat Farm, and given to a new family.

"Where's my mama? Why are you taking me away?" may be among the frightened cries of the next species of animals who are dragged from their parents for being too portly

Dog Magazine whines that Britain is weighed down by a growing number of obese pets: “As a society it’s time to give a name to the fat dog epidemic sweeping the country.”  OK, maybe Paunchy Pooch syndrome? Corpulent Canine disorder? No, the magazine calls it animal cruelty. And lately, British courts do, too. There’s got to be a better way to trim down dogs and not break their hearts or those of their people.

What’s next – taking fat kids away from their parents?

A textbook case of Reason No. 3

1)    It’s bad for their joints and heart

2)    It’s bad for your image

3)    They can’t fit into their winter coats

4)    They look terrible in skinny jeans

5)    It makes them more prone to doggy diabetes

6)    It makes them more prone to getting stuck in         the doggy door

An embarrassing instance of Reason #6

7)    Three words: Thit cho hap (You don’t want             to know)

8)    They’re dead ringers for engorged ticks

9)    Richard Simmons may pay you a visit

10)  Your dog may want him to stay

Reason #9

Reason No. 10

]]> http://www.dogdailynews.com/2009/11/13/top-10-reasons-dogs-should-not-get-fat/feed/ 0 http://www.dogdailynews.com/2009/11/07/calling-all-fat-dogs/ http://www.dogdailynews.com/2009/11/07/calling-all-fat-dogs/#comments Sun, 08 Nov 2009 03:44:58 +0000 Dog Daily News http://www.dogdailynews.com/?p=726

This guy looks more like an engorged tick than a dog!

Do you know a portly pooch? A fat Fido? A corpulent canine?

Tell him not to hang his heavy head. Sure, it’s better for him if he sheds some pounds, but he may soon have his time in the spotlight (the ultra-wide spotlight). The E! show, Chelsea Lately, is asking anyone who knows a very fat dog to submit a picture of their larger than life friend to their show at the above link.

The prize? Not much: The rotund Rover’s photo may have a chance to be seen on Chelsea’s show one of these nights. We’re not talking a $1 million modeling contract. But at least full-figured dogs will be able to flaunt their paunch instead of trying to suck it in to seem more svelte.

We’re not sure why Chelsea is asking for photos of fat dogs. We can only hope it has nothing to do with all this talk lately about how eating dogs isn’t such a bad idea. Could Chelsea be looking for her Thanksgiving dinner? We shudder. We shudder… (And now we actually are happy and relieved for our friend, Fat Bob, who has dropped dozens of kilos from his frame recently. He will escape her beast feast.)

Our wide-screen TV is warmed up and tuned in…

This is just the sort of thing we're talking about...

It’s getting a little creepy, to say the least. A couple of weeks ago there was a big hubbub about the book, “Time to Eat the Dog? The Real Guide to Sustainable Living.” And on the heels of that came “Eating Animals,”  a book about factory farming that includes a section on how eating dogs might actually be good for the earth. Maybe it was tongue in cheek, but it sure left a bad taste in our mouths.

Today, a piece in The New York Times keeps the story alive. It talks about all the rancor “Time to Eat the Dog?” has stirred up. The premise of the idea, for any of you dogs who understandably have buried your head in the sand, is that the ecological footprint for a dog is enormous – twice that of an SUV. Eating dogs, however, would create a much smaller Fido footprint, and take advantage of an abundant food source. Or something like that. To be frank (and lord knows I am Frank!) we couldn’t stomach reading all the details of their gory plan.

Apparently there are still many good people whose stomachs turn over at the thought of dogs being the next chicken. They’re writing blistering comments all over the web, and they’re penning notes to the New Zealand authors of this book. The book’s authors are scratching their heads, much as their future dream meals do sometimes, but for different reasons (fleas).

“The reason we called the book ‘Time to Eat the Dog’ with a question mark is, we were not actually suggesting that you should actually eat your dog,” co-author Robert Vale said in an interview. “And we didn’t provide any recipes in the book.”

Watching "To Serve Man" will give humans an appreciation of what we dogs are going through now

Well bravo, Bobby! You used a question mark, and you didn’t include any recipes in the book! We feel much better now. Not! It’s really no comfort, but I suppose it’s not quite as bad as the Twilight Zone episode, “To Serve Man.” (We won’t give away the punch line, but if you haven’t seen the episode, it’s worth a look – especially if you’re a human who wants to know how the dog-on-a-plate idea gives dogs the willies.)

Meanwhile the mere fact that two books have recently hit the shelves and garnered tremendous publicity because they espouse dog eating – even if purely for purposes of getting publicity – makes us uneasy. Zulu is positively trembling. Oh wait, he always does that.

According to Jonathan Safran Foer, author of “Eating Animals,” eating dogs is perfectly legal in 44 states. Yes, United States states.  And if you’ve ever wanted to know about dog meat (The very term makes us shudder!!!), a Wikipedia entry tells all. It even provides a chart revealing our nutritional value.

Maybe Vale can pat himself on the back because he didn’t include a recipe, but Foer cannot. He provides a recipe for Stewed Dog, Wedding Style, which hails from the Philippines. (We won’t reprint it or add a link, lest someone decide to try this at home.) If this were made from beef, for instance, we’d be licking our chops. But since it’s made from our fine furry friends, it makes us retch.

Oh great. A cookbook whose main ingredient is healthy dogs. I think I'll start smoking.

There are already plenty of popular pooch dishes around the world. Here are some examples of dog dishes that are beloved in Vietnam. (It’s safe to assume that “cho” is Vietnamese for dog.):

Thit cho hap – steamed dog meat

Doi cho – dog sausage

Canh Xao Mang Cho – Bamboo shoots and dog bone marrow

Cho Xao Sa Ot – Fried dog in lemon grass and chili

We think it’s time we dogs launch an advertising campaign, sort of like the anti-smoking campaigns that have been so successful at preventing kids from picking up the ciggy habit Maybe the premise can be, “Eat Dogs: Get Rabies.” It can happen. Dog flesh can indeed transmit rabies. Ironic, isn’t it, that you can get rabies from biting a dog, when it’s usually the other way around?

Whether dog bites man, or man bites dog, it’s never a good thing. Let’s end this madness now. Let’s put down our forks, stop baring our teeth, and discuss this rationally. Perhaps over a meal.

We only ask that when you send us the invitation, it doesn’t say, “Dear dog. We would like to have you for dinner.”

Fat Bob in his idyllic obese days.

We’ve been having a little disagreement here at the office. It’s about a dog named Bob. Fat Bob, to be precise. Fat Bob was living the high life in Scotland. He enjoyed a regular diet of fish suppers and four cans of dog food nearly every day. He became a bit large on this heavenly menu. In fact, he got to be 64 kg (141 pounds). At the time, he was considered the heaviest dog in Scotland, according to a BBC article. He was so obese that he couldn’t scratch his ears.

So the authorities stepped in. Apparently they like dogs to be able to scratch their ears. They convicted his person, Ralph Dryden, of causing unnecessary suffering by overfeeding him. They confiscated him from poor Ralph, and re-homed him with a family that put him on a strict diet and exercise regimen. Fat Bob lost a third of his body weight, and now tips the scales at a sleek 41 kg (90 pounds). The BBC article says he has a spring back in his step. This is supposedly a happy ending.

I beg to differ. It seems  a bit drastic to have taken Fat Bob away from Ralph. Ralph claimed Bob was a stray, and came to him very fat. Ralph is probably a really nice and caring fellow who just needed to learn to set limits. I can’t imagine Bob was too happy being taken from the person he loved, and put on this radical diet and exercise program. Talk about animal cruelty! (Ralph, if you are reading this and want another dog to overfeed and love, please contact me ASAP. I only get kibble. Can you believe it? I would love to be your dog.)

That's Bob, formerly "Fat Bob." Sure he has a spring in his step. That's probably because that morsel that man is holding up is his only food of the day!

There had to be ways around this. Ralph could have been instructed to keep Bob’s food intake down. Some people have a hard time doing this, so he could have even been monitored, if need be. But the law didn’t have to wrench these two blokes apart! Jasper agrees with me. (Good dog, Jasper.) However, Ida and Zulu think the authorities did the right thing. “Look how happy he looks in that photo on the right!” sighs Ida. “He’s all bouncy!”  I think that’s because that morsel of food in the guy’s hand is probably the only food he gets all day, so of course he’s going to have a spring in his step.

Ralph, I’m serious. Call me. I will be your devoted, loving, faithful friend. I will be your Greyfriars Bobby. And I promise that I won’t even need to scratch my ears because I will come from the states with several years’ worth of Frontline. They will not be able to wrench us apart. I will be with you through thin and through thick…

He may be 147, but Otto is not taking old age lying down (Otto is the dog)

Otto, a 20-year-old dachshund-terrier mix from England, may be the heir apparent to the title of World’s Oldest Dog. But chances are that if Guinness World Record investigators confirm that Otto is indeed the crown wearer, he won’t sit in his throne for long. This is one active pup, for someone so ancient. He may be almost 21 in human years, but in dog years he’s 147. I want to know what’s in the water in Shropshire. Send me a sample, would you, old bloke?

Check out this short video on the old but spry man. He is admittedly very cute. I have to say that if I were pampered like he is, I would live a very long and happy life myself. But no one’s feeding me Sunday dinners every day of the week or letting me cozy up in bed beside them at 8 pm. I am forwarding this to my people. If they want me to live long and prosper, they’re going to have to start making some changes around the old abode…

(A big thank you to Zipper and his person Michael for sending us the link to this story. Zipper, you already live the life of Riley, whoever he was. Wish me luck with my quest to do the same. I am ready to retire the dog bed ASAP.)

Jen treats beloved dog Norman like her child, friends say (Photo: Elle)

Poor Jennifer Aniston. It looks like she may be losing her dear Corgi-Terrier, Norman. The boy is 14, and apparently suffering from severe health problems related to digestion, according to an article in Screen India.

Jen is said to be terrified she could be losing him soon. She has another dog, a 3-year-old white German Shepherd named Dolly. But Norman has been with her through many of her relationship difficulties. (She got him after her breakup with Brad Pitt.) Last year he was rumored to “hate” then Jen-Man John Mayer. Apparently Jen listened to Norman’s counsel.

Here are some choice nuggets about Norman, gleaned from an article on Examiner.com.

Jen and Norman have been almost inseparable for years (Photo: Examiner.com)

• He is not a typical fluffy, foofy, puffy-wuffy celeb dog. He is as down to earth as she appears to be.

• He was to have some scenes in Marley & Me, but he ended up on the cutting room floor.

• To ease his older dog aches and pains, Jen takes him to get massages, acupuncture, and Reiki treatments.

• Earlier this year he ran away from their Malibu home and was rescued by none other than the omnipresent paparazzi.

A Monsters & Critics article this summer noted that Norman is a rather jealous dog. On the set of Marley & Me, he was allegedly kept away from most of the pooches Jen was shooting with because of his jealousy of them. (We’re not sure how he showed this jealousy. Did he turn green? Did he bark and growl? Did he write threatening letters?) It’s understandable that he’d be a bit protective of his person, especially since she’s known for going almost everywhere with him.

If Norman ends up in the promised land of slow cats and steak trees, it will be a hard transition for Jen. She’s gotten through many rough patches in her life. But Norman was at her side.

Norman and Jen, our thoughts are with you.

This is not Pip passed out drunk. It's a reasonable likeness, however, since this is a 4-month-old Puggle who doesn't look terribly conscious. (Photo: Legacy Kennels.)

A story in the Cedar Rapids Gazette today tells of an Iowa City man who allegedly poured vodka into the bowl of a puppy he was babysitting for 30 minutes and encouraged him to drink. And it seems the puppy, Pip, liked the idea and lapped it right up. Perhaps it was from a lovely bottle of chilled Chopin, which even the most discerning palates enjoy (it’s a potato vodka from Poland; if the pup likes potatoes, he may have thought he was drinking a tuber). Or maybe it was some cheap Walmart knockoff. Puppies usually aren’t too discerning. I should know. I was once a puppy.

Was Chopin to blame?

Regardless of the brand, the result was not pretty:

According to the newspaper account, when Pip’s person turned up to retrieve him, the dog was unresponsive, barely breathing, with his tongue hanging out. The babysitter allegedly said to Pip’s person that “Pip’s a little drunk right now.”

That’s not OK. The pup, whom the story identifies as a “Puppgle,” which we think is a misprint for “Puggle,” is only 4 months old. Puggles, a cross between a beagle mom and pug dad, probably already have enough issues since they’re related to pugs. (Zulu has the day off or I wouldn’t be able to write this.) But a 4-month-old puggle is quite small, and the amount of vodka he drank was probably quite large. The dog almost died of alcohol poisoning, but critical care for two days at the vet’s pulled him through.

The man who got Pip drunk is now facing animal abuse charges that could get him up to two years in the slammer and a fine of up to $5,000. That’s one expensive lesson. We’ll bet he thinks twice before offering a drink to an underage dog. However, if he would like to buy me a glass of port sometime, I won’t say no. I’m partial to the sweet drinks, and I am of the legal age for everything except social security.

On top of all his puggy maladies, Sarge deals with the humiliation of wearing costumes at least once a month

Zulu, our staff neurotic who happens to be a pug, asked me not to include this slide show from The Onion, but I think it’s too good to censor for his sensitivities. The slide show focuses on pugs and all their little physical and mental issues.  It goes hand-in-paw with an Onion article about a massive recall of all 2007 pugs. (Zulu is one of these models. Shh. Don’t tell him. It won’t help his myriad neuroses.)

The Onion reports that Meredith's fused intestines and chronic wandering lung syndrome (WLS) now confine her to a small cabinet in her owner's living room.

After looking at the slide show, we’re tempted to set forth our own hypothesis as to why pugs are so plagued with oddball problems. We’ve come to the conclusion — and I think science will bear this out — that it’s all the costumes pugs have to wear throughout their puggy lives. It’s not just Howl-o-Mean costumes (see previous post for more on these), but the seemingly year-round attempts to shove pugs into costumes and human garb “because they’re just so darn funny looking,” as one pug’s person recently put it.

Only time will tell. In the meantime, if you happen to know any pugs — especially those born in 2007 — it’s best not to share this information with them. It will serve no purpose, and will only add to their list of things to worry about. And I think we can all agree that they don’t need anything else on their little puggy plates.